things I do while waiting for the craptastic slow server to upload my work

I have a quilt of jobs. I piece them together so that my family can afford to do things like go out to dinner and take trips and buy decent pairs of shoes and enjoy life in our fine City.

I also look at pictures about writing and drinking.

I also look at pictures about writing and drinking.

One of those jobs involves uploading information into an ancient database system and then going off and entertaining myself for five minutes at a stretch while the little wheel spins on the computer.

It’s amazing what you can get done in small 5 minute segments. Things I do:

Go to the bathroom.

Notice bathroom is nasty.

Clean the bathroom. (I work from home. It’s not like I’m cleaning some stall in a high-rise.)

Heat up a burrito in the microwave.

Look at Facebook.

Write pretentious Facebook status update.

Load cute photo of my kids to Facebook.

Watch Justin Timberlake on YouTube.

Get all hot and bothered by Justin Timberlake.

Send sexy texts to my husband.

Yoga poses to get the JT out of my system.

Eat burrito.

Work on non-paying zine project.

Get distracted by inbox.

Write witty emails to friends.

Send my sister scary pictures of sharks.

Open bottle of wine. (Only if it’s after 5, y’all.) (Otherwise it’s beer.)

Fiddle with my Pandora settings.

Write poems.

Sneak chocolate.

Read old stuff I’ve written with a harsh new critical eye of self-loathing for what I’ve yet to accomplish. (Not really.) (Well, maybe a little bit.)

Write notes about things I want to write in the future.

Read book reviews.

Kick myself for not having come up with that idea.

Read blog posts by funny women.

Feel inspired.

Write blog posts.

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4 thoughts on “things I do while waiting for the craptastic slow server to upload my work

  1. How many of those things in each five minute window? Impressive list. I’m wondering: Is “Yoga Poses” a euphemism?

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