Disrupt This Tech: 13 Apps for SF Parents That May or May Not Exist (With a Last-Minute SF Giants Addition!)

Some of these apps might actually be out there, or at least in beta. I haven’t had time to do the research because I’m too busy teaching my toddler how to identify the best single-origin coffees by flavor profiles.

If these apps don’t exist already and you are looking for a new idea for a start-up, go ahead and grab one of these bad boys and throw it into your business plan. I’m just gonna open source it.

An app to help us get around when Giants fans act like this.

An app to help us get around when Giants fans act like this.

So here you go. A few ideas for apps that would serve San Francisco parents well:

  1. A public school lottery app.
  2. An app that tells you the ratio of dog shit to grass on a soccer field or grassy park.
  3. A “where is a goddamn changing table around here or do I have to do this deed in the stroller or back of the car again?” app.
  4. Which Restaurants Have Highchairs App. Bonus points for Which Restaurants Have Highchairs That are Not Broken App.
  5. An app that tells me: “Where can I breastfeed and not be stared at by confused 24 year olds or judged by crotchety 60 year olds?”
  6. Fog Free Playground App. Works best in the summer.
  7. An app that lets parents order organic, free-range, local, artisanal, vegan, gluten-free lunches to their kid’s Waldorf preschool. (Scratch that. I feel certain that this one must be out there by now.)
  8. Teach my adolescent son to groom his budding hipster facial hair app.
  9. An app that tells me how long the line is at BiRite Ice Cream vs. Mitchells vs. Humphry Slocombe.
  10. Measure the ratio of pot smoke to fresh air in Dolores Park or Duboce Park on a sunny Saturday afternoon.
  11. An app that tells me how gifted and/or special and/or high-needs my child is and whether or not that warrants special school considerations kicking into place (see #1).
  12. Where is the nearest preschool playgroup that offers Mandarin immersion and/or succulent gardening and/or knitting?
  13. Apps that teach kids to write business plans for their startup apps.

Last minute World Series addition: An app that helps you plan where you can celebrate the Giants winning the World Series while avoiding all the douches who set fire to the City and smash things. (This app definitely needs to be created soon…because you KNOW the Giants are going to win again! Yay Giants!)

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